Sometimes life may be more complex than we realize.. A friend on Facebook posted a piece of writing today on this it spoke of how sometimes the princess rolls her eyes and does not want to be rescued, that at time dragons need saving and villians need help. It concluded that a woman who appears to be a witch, may in time be revealed a queen.
This made me think of my dear blogger friend Alex who was so abused by his mother and has such a difficult time now, like me, managing the traumatic impacts on his body and mind.. He always talks to me about how the villian could not even exist if there was no hero and that if people had an awareness of or empathy for what they suffered their actions may make sense.
Sometimes heroes maybe too busy trying to save others they end up neglecting their own needs, too. That bought to mind my struggles as a seven planet Aquarian I was trying to write about earlier today who feels she must respond to any kind of crisis others go through. Its taking me time to pull back from that pattern and let others muddle through despite pleading and other manipulative tactics.
Who knows what role the difficult people are playing in our own life, who is to say that our enemy is not our best teacher as the Buddhist say? Maybe we go through tragedy, loss, betrayal and trauma to learn to be more humble and spiritually minded or more savvy. Maybe we lose things we did not always fully appreciate so we can learn the value of them over time.
At one time we may have been victims but there are ways to celebrate that what happens to us may be about a larger plan. Today on the final season of Grace and Frankie, Frankie’s son Coyote and his partner Jessice were arguing over the issue of love, committment and soul mates, the ‘destined to be’ partner’s ideal. Coyote said he believed we must choose to love and then commit, Jessica his girlfriend felt their meeting was divinely orchestrated, Nick comes in to referee on this one after crashing Coyote’s attempt to propose and helps them to see it may not be an either or proposition Perhaps loving partnerships involve both magic/serendipity and committment/active choice.
Lee Harris said in his recent June update that this month we should beware of holding onto our own entrenched ego positions and think about the value of allowing ourselves not to ultimately believe that our point of view or take on thing is ultimately ‘right” and that of others ‘wrong’.. There seems to be a lot of that happening in my life right now.. Scammers are turning out not to be the person who looked like the scammer, others are stepping in to take advantage of the vulnerable due to my own doubts..
Things are not as cut and dried as they so often seem in this Universe, sometimes for the sake of peace it may be better to reevaluate our tendency to judge. Liz Gilbert was arguing this point in the recent post I shared from her writings about creativity, approval and judgement. When we feel safe and less defended in our own skin (less ego invested) possibly we are more open to other’s opinions, more willing to keep an open mind and heart in the interest of connecting, understanding and loving.
In Al Anon I was often asked to the answer to this question.. “would you rather be right or happy?” Sometimes we may also need to let go of what our ego thinks will make us happy to find that true happiness instead lies in adopting a different perspective, attitude or take on or approach to life one that fosters peace and joy.