To heal, to support, to inspire, to grow : to give voice

When I think about my values and the purpose of my blog these four things come to mind.. It is inspiring to me when via this medium we get to connect with others on a journey of inner growth and can help each other.. Along the way of my own blogging path so many people have showed up, many of them moved on but I learned so much from them and I hope at times I in taking the risk to be vulnerable, honest and open in sharing somehow helped others.

I am constantly deeply moved and also inspired to read of how others work to process their trauma in therapy and by other means and am also inspired by how poetry can also help us. I was just reading further portions of Kim Rosen’s book on being healed by poetry in which she shared how the poems of Rumi, Emily Dickinson, Juan Ramon Jimenez among others inspired her..She then shared one of her own poems :

Not the high mountain monastery

I had hoped for, the real

face of my spiritual practice

is this:

The sweat pearls on my cheek

when I tell you the truth, my silent

cry in the night when I think

I’m alone. The trembling

in my own hand as I reach out

through the years of overcoming

to touch what I had hoped

I would never need again.

There are parts of us that can be bound in shame and touching them through active imagination or even writing can be a perfect way of externalizing them. It may take a real act of courage to do this but its important we get it out. After all once we bring these things out into the open then we can explore them and they may even get a chance to transform, at the very least we get to form a relationship with our inner world and that of others and so we can grow, heal, inspire and connect.

I was also having some thoughts about this issue of shame yesterday in terms of generational influences..I was wondering if the generation of millenials (born 1980 to 1996) and then Gen X suffered as much from these shame bound feelings as my own…. Baby Boomer generation (born 1946 to 1965). I am sure that feelings and our need to be in touch with then often stay problematic when their expression was seen as an inconvenience or mistake in some way and it becomes harder too to expose the self in a society where not making it or succeeding becomes a sign of a your lack of worth.

I see signs around me lately that this may be turning around but I also see how much people struggle with their own fears of vocalising or being honest..In fact I was just listening to a program on the benefits of singing to babies and young children to help them learn and the lady interviewed spoke of the fear many parents have of signing as they were told they could not sing growing up or missed out on being selected for the school choir.. How sad then for them to close down that avenue of expression.

The need to be perfect can be so crippling, the need to adhere to rules or strict parameters of expression or non expression may continue to trap that silent scream down deep inside of us.. In fact googling that term yesterday I came across what looked to be a very good book by the same name of poetry written by a solider with PTSD that had received interviews full of praise and admiration on Amazon. I then came across a wonderful painting done by a fellow blogger along with a piece of writing which spoke about this silent scream (see link below)

We never know what silent secret we have buried may help others through the telling of it. For myself, I have seen the damage of silent histories never spoken of in both my family and the lives of others. The bringing out of the secret may bring some shame down upon us by others invested in it remaining silent, but never the less we need to speak it out. and then we can possibly bring wisdom, compassion or understanding to that situation of constriction or restriction. At the very least even if we can never erase the pain of what happened, in acknowledging it, sharing about it, exploring its dimensions and has affects in our way of relating and making sense, in also seeing how it connects our being and soul to the being and soul of others we get an opportunity to build bridges inwardly and outwardly and also help to reduce in all of our lives the crippling silencing power of toxic shame which unrecognised fuels the separatist nature of the inner and outer critic.

2 thoughts on “To heal, to support, to inspire, to grow : to give voice

  1. I feel the bridges you speak of in this post. 💗I appreciate your insightful thoughts and perspective on this concept of the silent scream. Our voices become much more audible when they are joined alongside others. 💗💗💗

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