Hold onto yourself

Sometimes all you can do

Is hold onto yourself

When people rain down their blame and shame

Onto you

When it gets so hard to stand the abuse

What else can you do

Feels a lot like being hit over the head

With a four by two or lump of lead

There are shreds of iron filings I cough up

Trying to come to terms with this

Struggling to find my own sense of completeness

And trust

God knows this is my battle

I opened the door and gave too much

And the more you give

The more they ask

And the harder it becomes

When things fall apart

And they blame you

And yet this is the vulnerability of human need

Of a child still not able to skillfully wear

That cloak of self protection

All I can do is pray to God

There is an amour the bible tells us to put on

But inside the armour

All of my heart is dissolving in pain

You say I let you down

But it was not me it was you

I never asked this much of you

Why is it me who has to serve

As the toxic dumping ground

For all of your pain

All of your shame

All of own self betrayal?

Guess this is just the curse

Of the emotionally neglected

Boundaryless

Highly sensitive

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