Authenticity

Today I know

When I embrace my own heart

There was a reason I felt

So very set apart

From this human world

Perhaps it was not an aberration for me

To struggle to find the way

There were so many land mines

All around

That trust in secure and solid ground

Never enabled me to deeply take root

Or completely embrace

The truth of my self

And when I turned to you in desperation

After you found me drowning

It was not fair of me to ask you to

Save me

To be supported would have been a gift

One you were not capable of giving

And perhaps it was not your place

I see that now

Why do we fight the changes

Evolution brings

Why do we cling so desperately to that which

Only holds phantom echoes

Of desires thwarted

In earlier life

But there is one thing I know

In many ways

This is a path I must

So often walk alone

Along a path I pray one day

Leads me out of this

Soul hibernation

Perhaps the answer does not

Lie in some far off place

For in moments when I embrace

My true authentic self

feeling it a friend who always walks

A step ahead

Then it is I feel complete

But often only in the silence

Please forgive me if

At times

It seems a difficult thing

To be with you

When often I feel myself still to be

So very young

This new way of living

Is still not fully known to me

But in these precious moments

Of true connection

I am finally learning

What it might mean for me

To finally live a life

Where I am completely free