Dad I never got to say goodbye
I am sorry our last words were an argument
Father you were always farther away from me
And I struggled to understand
Could you really see, feel and hear the real me
So many times when I tried to tell you what I needed
You said no
So Dad now its so hard sometimes to trust
And to let myself have what I need
If you had lived today you would be 97
Now you are a ghostly presence
Who I will never truly say I can know
Lost to me I long for your holding and love
In all kinds of ways
So how can I resolve the need to be known and loved by a man?
Oh Dad how much I wish things were different
Somewhere deep inside I think I felt
All the things you hid
Under a cover of silence
But how will I ever know?
This is heartbreaking. xx
Yes so much heartbreak ❤
I was going to say the same as Rayne.
I relate to this in many ways. It’s clear from what you write that your relationship or more accurately the absence of one, is different than the one I experienced with mine, but I can read in there some similarities too.
I’m sorry you had less of a relationship with your father than you wanted and needed.
Thank you if he lived longer it May have been different I will never know ☺
❤💚❤
Lots of hugs!