When you are alone When you feel alone in your deepest soul Does it make any sense that even then you are connected In the feeling of great absence And possibly a longing for a fully engaged presence Or even just the aching desire to be solitary Alone can be at times the deepest pit of blackness that seems to suck you down A vortex in which your deepest fear may be that who you are is really disappearing or dissolving I have had this feeling As though my body was no longer made of solid substance But was instead was porous a mixed up microcosm of many cells vibrating in liquid space And then my mind wondered If I would be able to collect myself and my body and not dissolve into a pool of water on the floor Shame soaking every cell And making it permeable to others judgements that could obliterate or destroy me These were all experiences that I have or had That transformed in time That were neither permanent nor endurable They all passed Just as my feelings pass Rising and falling like the cresting and passing of a wave pulled on by the Moon’s gravitational field And as I write warm sunlight reminds me that all alone here I am never really alone Perhaps the sun moon wind and stars feel me revolving in their orbits As they bleed their beauty through to an evolving consciousness and being Seemingly fixed in time But really never constant Always shifting Always transforming Always changing
Emerging From The Dark Night 