Last night I was having even more insights into how important it is that I choose love over fear in my life. I see how much my own fear has dominated my life in all kinds of unconscious ways. Fear is not bad or wrong, it is a genuine response to trauma, danger, suffering or hurt however learning to manage my reaction to these things and the power of fear in my life is such important emotional recovery work, for I cannot truly live a peaceful loving life if my entire consciousness is dominated by fear and its lingering affects.
On any day if hurt I can find ways to choose love in the midst of this hurt, deepening the intimacy with my own soul and watching how I react and respond and the things I tell myself in the midst of fear, hurt, anger or pain.
With this in mind I am sharing the following reading from my daily reader Hope For Today.
Before I came to Al Anon. my attitudes were based on fear. I cast all my doubts and feelings of unworthiness onto others. I set myself up as a victim, I always acted on my anxiety, and I was forever reacting. Most times my reactions came in the form of blaming, running or freezing. When I blamed others, I didn’t have to feel my deep sense of shame, I ran because facing my fear and hurt felt too difficult. I froze because frozen hearts don’t feel pain.
I no longer chose to be a victim. Now I chose to take responsibility for my actions. I choose how to act, how I think and how I feel about any situation that arises. I can choose fear or I can choose love. Fear keeps me shut off and unhealed. Love opens me up and heals me, I choose love.
Choosing love means I stay away from physically, emotionally or spiritually unhealthy situations. I no longer accept unacceptable behaviour. I love myself and care about myself to walk away from hurtful people and relationships. I look at my part in situations, own my mistakes and change my behaviour. Choosing love means I accept and embrace my humanity and that of others. Then, with my Higher Power’s help, I can see defects and weaknesses with compassion, with brings me release, joy and acceptance.
If I look for fear, I’ll find fear. If I look for love, I’ll find love. Which one do I choose to seek today?
The well of love refills itself. The more one gives of love, the more one has to give.
Hope for Today : April 13 P 104