Happy Daze

Child

Dazed in happiness

I am sugar coated in smiles

These are not the fake smiles

Of pretending I am doing fine

These genuine smiles of sunshine radiance

Suppressed so long along in a childhood where

I had to numb/dumb down

Be seen and never heard

But also not to be seen or take up space

Life was for adults bent on serious fun

That didn’t involve childhood joy

But now these smiles that light up my face

Are the solar beam of my hearts’ radiance

Falling free from my mouth

And lighting my eyes from deep inside

I am home in the place that is truly me

The space I vacated long ago

And learned to cover over

When I learned that joy and exuberance

Was to be feared

Was a sign of mania

Bah!!

Funereal black hooded nun devils

You cut off all joy and told us what was juicy and raw

Was all evil

Turning living backwards

Shoving it deep down inside us

Making us believe lies

Bullshit!

Joy is what you naturally feel

When your heart is awake

And your soul is on fire

And you body is alive

When you can say

With every fibre of your being

This is me

No apology

No argument

This smile is real

And your negativity

Can’t take it away from me!

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