The bed of nails

The bed of nails you made me lie in

Every night is remembered by my body

As I lay me down to sleep

I remember the pain of the head brace you made me wear

In your pursuit for perfection

Did you have any idea how much my entire face ached

Now that they cut the old bridge out

The new one clamps me down

Body memory

But I am not that young girl any more

On the brink of adulthood

So uncertain, so unsure of who she was as a girl

Not able to let go and trust

Braced inside against the anticpated onslaught

It’s why when we first got together

By body would jerk all over the place

It angered you

I got a serve

And it was harder and harder to relax

Now I live the memory

Knowing I did absolutely nothing wrong

You made it worse

Why did I stay in this torture?

It was all I knew

I cry for me now

That I thought I deserved no better

Now I must live with the memory

But never again will I let it haunt all my days and nights

It will be the touchstone I can touch

And then release

Putting it in a safe place

Where the memory cannot hurt me any more

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