Little girl
Where did you go?
From the age of 3
You knew what it was to feel a hole
When the sister you loved, left
You were not really old enough to understand
The ways of the adult world
And the one who championed and protected you was gone
Mother couldn’t be there
Not really
Who you were
For her felt like a kind of inconvenience
And her gaze was turned away
Toward the outer world
To her marriage
And within herself
Where could you go
But into inner fantasy
With a deep loneliness and frustration that burned
But desire was there too
Deep in the centre of it
It wasn’t all bad
And now
You must learn to trust
That thwarted desire is not wrong
But can be misrepresented, misplaced
Now you are no longer a child
Oh no?
Yes you still are, darling
But there is here with you now
An adult self
Who is finally beginning to understand
All the ways you got lost
All the ways you tried to find
To stop feeling
In the midst of the most painful shit going down
When no one was there
You learned only ways to gravitate
Around bigger suns
Who took all of the light
And all of your longing and power
Led into deep despair
Depression and grieving
For all the things lost
You could never know
Until now
Know sweet darling
That each tear you cry
Leads you closer home
Each anger you feel
Is a deeper message
Of your life spirit’s blood returning
A red rose
Born from ashes
No longer bleached white
Together we can find
The lost child within
Who holds the key to redemption
A child who needs s0 desperately
Your tenderness
Protection
Mercy
Understanding
Guidance
And care
I’ve just stumbled across Dr. Jonice Webb. You should read some of her articles when you have time
She is fantastic that book Running in Empty explained my entire childhood…thanks for recommending 💖
Wow! What are the chances I would comment this to you, then scroll down to see your other post about Dr Webb??💫🤔
This is lovely and sad. It is very similar to what I was getting at. Thanks for sharing ❤